A Good day to die easy

"I need you to understand Aparna... Its not going to be possible..." whispered his son-in-law. Aparna took a deep breath for the news to sink in. She murmured back " Lets not tell him now.... though being him , he might have already known." Saket did not overhear this conversation, but knew what news was being transmitted and instantly felt uneasy and different. Sensing that her father was still gazing  from the glass window at both of them , Aparna paused the 'hush-hush' conversation , looked at her father, smiled gently and raised her thumbs. Saket just smiled back from inside. Somewhere deep within her, Aparna knew that her father knew.

Saket clad in green from top to bottom now twisted to the other side of his hospital bed and began staring at the blank wall. Uneasiness was beginning to hit him hard. He began to sweat. It seemed his body released  epinephrine, norepinephrine and dozen other fear hormones at the same time. Saket, aged 70 has been fighting his battle with a peculiar disease for which he was undergoing several tests and little treatment at the hospital where his son-in-law is a doctor.

...........

The door opened."Apologies for being late Deepak. My wife insisted on me having the dinner before I left".

"Not at all sir. No problem."

Deepak pulled a wooden chair for Raja to sit. "Not unusual that there is a huge hype surrounding it... Is it not sir ?" asked Deepak . Raja ,his superior nodded his head , looked down at his footwear, dug in his toe , and pushed a pile of dust that had accumulated in the last 15 days. "I am just proud and happy to be part of history." Raja replied. He stood up from his wooden chair, went across the storage section and caressed his hands slowly at thickly wrapped books and continued " Media does help. In our case , more money."

Raja breathed in the aroma of newly bound books.He had done the same for four previous editions of it. He bent down the racks to check whether the bundles were properly tied and in the process caused the contents of his shirt pocket(Paper bits, visiting cards, Restaurant bills etc) to fall on the dirty floor.Among the fallen items ,he picked up only his visiting cards. He blew out the dust , wiped them by caressing it along his chest and kept it back in his pocket. Other fallen items continued to lie on the floor though.

Raja thought himself to have a much more significant role in his job than the designation printed on his visiting card which read as " Raja Mukherjee : Warehouse Manager , Bloomsbury Publications India - Central Warehouse , Kolkatta ".Today he felt, he was informally given a responsibility from the management."Bring on the mattress, its time we get some sleep.. We have a busy day tomorrow. More books are on the way." said Raja with pride.  "Yes sir.Give me a minute..". Raja observed the ceiling fan above and managed to find some spider webs."Bring a wet cloth too, we need to wipe the fan before we lie under it".
"Ok sir."

...........                                                                        

Saket was game for a midnight adventure.The night was regular , like many other nights , nothing special or extraordinary. Saket had worked his way through the gates like a regular and nobody could detect. He moved without a single pause and was outside the ever crowded hospital (which represented a mall) in five minutes. Having no other option, he decided to take his son-in-law's old green-and-blue bike. 

His ride was liberating and after having traveled for over an hour, he decided to stop by an old rusted building. He looked for passerby's and found none except some sleeping stray dogs. He pulled of his coat and went to the rear side of the building and broke in. The darkness notwithstanding , he courageously strolled along. 

.........

Raja had been waiting for the second lot to arrive for close to 2 hours in the morning. He then received a call from his superior informing him that no new books would be arriving due to a policy change. There would however be a review of warehouse around noon by delegates before further books arrived. The release date had been postponed. 

Bloomberg Global , had its own reservations before releasing the book in India. The piracy market was rampant and humongous. They had also to content with the population that would be reading it online. They went ahead with a reasonable pricing strategy. They went ahead because there was demand, and there was no doubt about it. The release of the book was much talked about even a year before it was supposed to release. Delegates from the parent company were sent overnight to several Indian locations to monitor theft and piracy. No new books would arrive until the delegates reported back favorably. 

Raja went back home , had a bath. His wife had prepared a sumptuous brunch. He refused it as he had to go back to the warehouse before noon. 

.........

Saket came back to his room quietly without anybody noticing but knew that his adventure will just start and will be an exciting one. What he didn't know was that he had just found more than a new friend after a long long time, the book in his hand; a friend for the remaining lifetime and metaphorically his future love. There was temptation though to read the last page. He had never done that before. And, he said to himself that he will never do it again."People who read the last page first have no life", he mumbled. He resisted the temptation and began his joy ride.

Page by page , he did read... Line by line, he did enjoy.... Word by word, he did relish.... Hour by hour.. he took six....And when the seventh had just began and he came to the last chapter....

..........

Officials from the management came to the warehouse around noon and immediately the inventory counting took place. A book was missing. Raja recounted them all. He bent down at the same place as he had done the previous night and to his surprise found the plastic cover in open mode.

                                   

The other contents of his shirt pocket were still there. Could it be the work of rodents ? Then how could an entire book vanish ?. Several questions were posed at Raja. He was perplexed and so was Deepak. A police FIR was lodged.Media broke open the news almost immediately. Needless to say Raja and Deepak were reprimanded.

.........

.....2 pages.....

Patience was running out. " Just 2 more..." he said to himself. His hands began to shiver. Tears flowed from his eyes. The concentration fluttered and he paused. He composed himself and re-read the page.

... Last page... 

He felt gloom and happiness at the same time.

... Last paragraph... 

Saket now knew that Harry lived. He also knew it much before the world knew. He had done it. He knew the end. Saket shut the book and looked upwards....... Little did he fuss for the excruciating pain that hit him couple of minutes later when life left him.

THE END

The Numbers from the Hidden Treasure..

I am right now attempting something similar to what Mark Zuckerburg supposedly did at his hostel room at Harvard University ( as portrayed in the film 'The Social Network'). I am right now Blogging and replying to birthday wishes on FB in two different tabs at the same time by switching tabs often...(Writing codes and blogging simultaneously was astonishing multitasking atrocity... ).I really like people who wish on Birthdays because , I don't. Sometimes I do.. Sometimes I don't. I don't remember birthdays until I open my facebook page through web.. I mostly FB through the phone and the FB app does not display birthdays on the front page and hence I miss wishing a lot of people... Hmmm.. A lot of my school friends..

So much has happened in the past 2 months... The least interesting of them all was I shifted home.. Not necessarily surprising.. It was special though... We 'discover' hidden 'treasures' during shifting , don't we ? Something very very special... Guess what ? I found my Class IX and X Report Card. The pages of class X were missing though.. So here it goes.. My Class IX Report Card and assessment remarks by the loathed Prathima Sharma Miss...  Wow..

Ha ha.. Treasure...  Nostalgic.

Those were the days where I was consistent. Yes. Consistent non performance.. I was getting some amazing scores.. kidding.. Some of the scores were too pathetic as you can see...

Those red underlines are the periodic class tests I failed.... See that 2.5 out of 20...?? Lol...  

This one is my Favorite page...  Wow... I have got a ZERO !! ROFL... 

My Overall Average was less than 40 in Maths and Science during Class IX. 

Very Very Honest comments from my Class Teacher... 

Courtesy my scores , I was promoted to Class X (what an achievement) based on an undertaking.. Warning Promotion ! 

There are a couple of interesting things here. You could have noticed that my father has never signed my report card. It was always my mother. Not that she was considerate (she was equally livid as my father and had more 'vocabulary' than my father) but for my father it was an 'ego' issue. He could not sign for a son who had failed almost all exams.However somewhere in between my Class X , he started signing again.(not that my scores improved dramatically). He was obviously worried about my scores and had approached for a astrologer's consultation who informed him that it was that 'seven and a half' saturn that was spoiling my efforts and I was actually taking efforts.. ha ha..  The truth remains that I simply did not study well.. I just lost interest.. I was in haze..  Unlike others , (who thronged every tuition centre in mylapore for being Class topper) I used to bunk tuition classes and go to play cricket.. I used to attend tests and exams without preparations.. I was such a care free person... But then,  (surprisingly) I always felt in the back of mind , that if I put my backside to one place and study , I could beat them all hands down... ( That confidence completely vanished one day which is a completely different story about which  I have written a lot). Its just that I did not study then... I was not serious enough with my studies....

Even at that age , I could see the funny side of my failure.. Frankly , It meant nothing to me... I just could not fathom girls fighting for half a mark with teachers.. still cant digest.. I never used to check the totals when I receive my paper.. I used to see my favorite question (Favorite question would always be that enrichment question which would be outside the syllabus ), look at what marks the teacher gave for that answer of mine and then would judge the quality of that teacher and stuff my paper in my bag. How arrogant !.

This report card is precisely the reason why my school teachers and classmates look at me with awe now when I meet them and say to them now that I am a Chartered Accountant..... "I always knew u were brilliant.. its just that you were little out of track.." is what my Classmate Sivaram KP said after I cleared. I replied.. " If only you knew the efforts that went with it , you would not call me brilliant..".  (According to me , CA course is an average student's best friend...  CA course does not want your brilliance.. You being brilliant or not is totally irrelevant... It needs only your efforts...).

I want to dwell on the irrelevance of these marks.. What marks you get at school is totally irrelevant after you join college.What marks you get in college is totally irrelevant after you go to a Job..

Having said that , If only I could have concentrated on Maths during my School days , I would now be fast with numbers. I could have cleared my CA exams a little earlier with less efforts.. The love for numbers has vanished in me only because of my indifferent attitude towards studies at school. The only way to be good and fast with numbers is to constantly practice with numbers.. I had not done that for 7 years in school. And suddenly , you give me numbers in life , I am slow.. Not one day goes without repenting on my slowness with numbers.. Not that I did not have the skills but I just did not cultivate it. I just did not practice it when it had to be practiced..

I was one extreme in school... I just wish I could have taken the mid-path.. But If I had, that would have not been me... :)

Paper...

This post is not about Times of India but since the topic is 'paper' I am unable to ignore that daily soft porn magazine.Even though , TOI has no relevance to this post of mine , I feel this is worth sharing. Incidentally when Deccan Chronicle was first introduced in Chennai , it cost only Re 1 (Penetration Pricing) and I remember my college mates buying it before entering Udhayam theater so that it can be torn into pieces and thrown on the screen.Even though TOI is costlier than DC nowadays , these guys now prefer to buy TOI before entering theaters just for the pleasure of tearing it and throwing on the screen. Yes.. Just for the pleasure of tearing it. (A lesser known fact - Goli's are put on Goli Soda bottles just to give the drinker the pleasure / satisfaction / kick factor arising out of his effort of forcing the Goli inside the bottle.. ! )

What about Paper then ?.. No. I do not intend to dwell (bore you)on greenery , environment and sustainability . I want to focus on the present day corporate 'cultured' (really?) world and on the ....

The Dreaded 'P' Word :

I first heard this term when I was coming down to the work space after having a sumptuous lunch. I just did not understand. The post lunch stupor did not help either... I ignored. Then couple of days later , a colleague  of mine from a different team wanted to know about his crush in my team. He came to me and asked "ava pottutaala?"..... "enna pottutaala ?" .. "adhaan da..ava paper pottutaala ? ellarum pesikuraakaanga..".... I knew she resigned and hence could connect 'Paper podradu' and resignation. The exact origin of this idiom is  still unknown ( I have googled ) and I think its use is restricted only in India... Nowadays  people ignore the  prefix and speak. Its just "pottutiya ?" or "pottutaana?" and thereby giving scope to many virginity related 'jokes' (and these so called 'grown ups' still call it a joke..!) Such jokes apart... I feel we need to focus on why this attrition happens..

I think a person will resign from a secure job only because of 2 reasons. One is 'Lack of job satisfaction' and the other obviously the' 'feeling' of better job opportunities' or a combination of both. (And there is an exception. Girls nowadays quit their jobs to get married and settle in America.!) Other reasons he/she may or may not disclose to the HR is according to me not a reason but a contributing factor to supra mentioned reasons.

Pay scale is an important factor. As humans we are most interested in knowing what the other person earns. We simply are not content and that makes us leave our jobs. Promotion or rather the lack of it is one other contributing factor to attrition rate. It hurts maximum when your peer or junior gets promotion before you. Obviously , everyone cannot be promoted. From what I have heard , there are some enterprises which have a very very poor promotion policy and some companies do not put to action a policy that exists. Recognition in one form or the other is absolutely vital.

Appraisal - The less said the better. Its just a formality exercise nowadays and seldom does anything fruitful come from it.Its obvious that people will just not accept poor performance rating . The way the management words it as 'Constructive feedback' is comical to say the least. Your performance counselor arrives and asks "so how do you think the year went ?". You are stumped. "hmmm.. good i guess..".. " It could have been better , is it not ?" and you are coerced to say what they want to say and you reply "yes.." Matter over. We just need to be happy with mid rating.Yes. The high performance ratings are reserved for the 'jalras'.. Most of these counselors have prejudice and that is the reason I feel this appraisal meetings are all pure waste of time.


There are people who leave their jobs because , they feel they are not being involved in certain jobs. There are people who leave their jobs because , they feel they are being involved only in certain jobs.Funny !. And there are also guys (very rare though) who feel that they do not belong to this corporate world.They are just uncomfortable with the profit motive of these enterprises and would be happier in a 'not for profit' organisation. Their moral value system hurts ! (quite extraordinary).

Education plays a very important role. There are effective and efficient people whose promotion and pay cycle are slow simply because they do not have the required qualification. Somewhere deep that hurts and they quit. Work environment also plays a major contributing factor. The conduct of their team members, the immediate reporting authority (a poor, short tempered boss) contributes to their decision. Some people quit because they need to report to too many people and need to multi task. (Its simple management theory that a person cannot and will not be able to report to more than two people efficiently . However , that is what is required nowadays. Nobody understands how practically difficult it is.) Some quit to continue their passion. Some quit to have more personal time. It happens in consultancy , where people move to industry to have more time to themselves. Some quit simply because they have been there for very long.!.. Some people move everywhere and then finally come to the place where they started ! . All this happens because , no body is happy where they are.. If only that changes...

Also , People do not choose their jobs wisely. Yes. People may not often get what they want. That's the time you need to be stubborn that you need only 'Petromax light'. Some wait for the 'Petromax light' , some do not and then suffer early in their career.They later quit and move because they want to be in their preferred line. When a person realizes that his tasks do not mesh well with his personality or talents , he quits.This according to me cannot be questioned. Its after all their lives and each one of them have a right to choose. I have heard many HR stories where they question the integrity of a person when he quits. Lack of integrity to me is selling your enterprise's data with another , not quitting and joining the other enterprise. In pure law terms, in absence of 'mens rea' , I feel the case is lost for the management to question the integrity of an employee. The management needs to understand that employee's have no loyalty nowadays. There is this tamil saying... "koorai mela sotha potta , aayiram kaka".. They know if they leave , another 'slave' is ready to occupy and hence there is little scope for loyalty etc.

Also , we need to look at the other side. Its tough on the recruiters too. People just drop in a mail to the HR and everything they think is over. The most interesting thing is the change in the attitude of both the management and the employee once the paper is put. The management thinks you are a dead resource and does not treat you properly during the 'notice period'. Its also very easy to find out who is 'that' person who has 'put papers' among your colleagues. The hitherto sincere guy who now comes late and leaves early is 'that' guy. 

P.s. I quit my job recently and joined its competitor.! (in a different service line though)